Doggone Wrong

I was a young bride, in 1975 and in 1976, I moved from the D.C. area to a little town called Sugargrove, Pa. The sweetest little town on the map. I was in the middle of Bumfuck, Egypt, living on 22 acres, getting my gas from a pumpjack, in the back yard. It was on Brokenstraw Oil land, my family's Oil Corp. and my new husband went to work for my Dad, fracking oil wells. I stayed home with the baby and the height of my day was to put the baby in the stroller and walk to the little store/gas station. This stroller was a contraption, that quite often collapsed on the child causing him to scream. I had nothing in common with the few sparse neighbors and it was a pretty lonely life. My husband bought me a toy collie, thinking it might make me feel better. I loved the little guy but couldn't really walk him cause with the collapsing stroller, which weighed a ton and his pulling on the leash, well, I gave up on the idea. I would hook him out on the side of the trailer, to do his business, go back in and do my wifely business, blasting the stereo and dancing with the baby. I never heard them coming...

I heard the dog barking with true intent, he wanted to kill something. I put the baby in the playpen and went to the door just in time to see the dog, break free from the collar, and chase after...something.

He ran swiftly and in an instant he was bowled over, laying in a heap on the side of the rode. Even then, I was crazy as I ran after this thing, cussing and swearing, calling them out, threatening their very lives. After a while, I tired, stopped and watched them go down the hill and around the bend. Out of breath and traumatized, I went back to my dog, who'd sat there, apparently watching me. He was sitting up and I checked him out and we both slowly walked back to the trailer. He was limping but was fine, other than that.

I was still holding the dog, close, when my husband, covered in green petroleum jelly, fresh from fracking a well, walked through the door. I burst into tears. He tried to comfort me, as I blurbed on about these awful people. He couldn't understand, who the hell I was talking about. I called them, "The people with the triangles." I was such a drama queen. When I was finally able to get it all out, that the horses had bowled the puppy over and the people with the triangles, all dressed in black, wouldn't stop, he figured out, I wasn't completely crazy, it was the Amish.

8 comments:

Paula said...

LOL! What a great story. I defintely was not expecting that ending. :)

Joshua said...

I got your back Babz (I think it used to be Babs, LOL - it threw me off, but I know who you are). It's Joshua! The_Gay_Dude's Bro. I linked Dirty Bitch Society on Gay Men Rule!

Anonymous said...

Miz UV, I was such an imbecile. I didn't know who the hell they were. I'd never seen Amish people before, never!

Anonymous said...

Joshua, oh sweetheart, it's just too good to hear from you. I hope you are well. I've missed you and I've missed Marc. I've never forgotten, never will. He touched a lot of lives, before he left us. That says a lot.
Thanks for the link darlin, ya Rule My Heart!

Webmiztris said...

I can't stand the Amish that refuse to even put an triangle on their buggy. they cause so many accidents! they should have to abide by at least SOME road rules if they're going to use the public roads! so what the hell, the horses ran over your dog? that's so fucked up....lOL poor little guy!

Anonymous said...

Webmiztris, I had no idea who they were. It was almost criminal, in my mind. Yes, if they don't put the signs on, at nite they are a hazard, for sure.

Jonathan said...

Speaking of Amish...

Q: What goes "Clip-clop-clip-clop-clip-clop...POW!!!...clip-clop-clip-clop"?

A: An Amish drive-by shooting!

DirtyBitchSociety said...

Jonathan, you are killing me dammit! hahaha!