Very Scary


I was talking to my youngest son, Wam aka Johnny Appleseed, the other nite. He calls me a few nites a week, filling me in on his Playboy escapades. He's a Manager of a store and there was a Fair across the street. There were Tigers, one white and the rest were normal. He told me all about them, as he stood in front of the cage, speaking with the trainer.
As he's walking, he's narrating the goings on and so on. He says, "Wow, you should see how fuckin big this Elephant is, Ma, it's huge." I told him to take pictures of them and the Tigers, with his cell phone. So, I told him, all about the time, when I was little at the fair... I said, "I rode an Elephant, when I was like 5 years old. It was kinda scary." He says, "Hah," scoffing at me and my elephant story and says, "Hell, I rode a fat chick two days ago, now that was scary..."

23 comments:

Xmichra said...

lol... that Wam.. what a character!

BEAST said...

How fat??....we need details , if for example she was riding on top....could he still hear the TV ???

Dirty Bitch Society said...

Xmichra, that's a nice way of putting it. Hide your daughter.

Dirty Bitch Society said...

Beast, omg, my poor baby. I don't think he's suicidal but I better broach the subject. He might be trying to hurt himself and I didn't even catch on.

Woogie said...

lmao! just like johnny appleseed!

DirtyBitchSociety said...

Woogie, this son, has children with three or four different women. I think he's trying to work the entire U.S. and Canada. He's a good guy though and works 6 days a week, 12 hour days. I'm kinda glad he works so much, less chance to get another girl pregnant. He loves women, that's for damn sure.

brotherray said...

HAHAHA! OOOOWEEE! Your son is a character indeed, and damn - he's good looking!

I rode an elephant one time (drunker than a coot - me and the better half). I was scared, but we started laughing so hard - I pissed in my damn pants. I did not want to get OFF that elephant. I said pleeeeeze pay for a second ride!

DirtyBitchSociety said...

Brotherray, just proves, you'll ride anything, huh? hahaha! I was little and I was scared but since that time, I've rode worse than an elephant. Not too awfully proud of it either, lol!

Old Knudsen said...

Who said romance was dead?

Dirty Bitch Society said...

Old Knudsen, or chivalry, huh? See at least he didn't make her do all the work. He's considerate like that, ya know?

Anonymous said...

God he's dreamy. Does he have blue eyes? Hope you don't mind me saying so, but I wish he'd come to Canada. I'd marry him, I'd have his baby's, I'd cook his meals, do his laundry, clean his house and love him for all time. I am in love. I am 30 and live by myself and my three mastiffs but I'd make room for him. Babz, please let me marry him?
Remember me, it's Jasmine.

Woogie said...

and we love him!

DirtyBitchSociety said...

Jasmine, I'm putting him on the bus in the morning, lol!

DirtyBitchSociety said...

Woogie, yes we do. He's a bad, bad boy but we still love him and all bad boys like him. He's got a real good heart but he's a bad boy, lol!

Jonathan said...

Doin' a fat chick is like riding a moped: it's a lot of fun, but you don't want your friends to know you've done it!

DirtyBitchSociety said...

Jonathan, hahaha! I imagine, he doesn't have bragging rights on that one, huh? Yes, he'd never admit to a moped ride either.lol!

DirtyBitchSociety said...

Jonathan, you're up early today, eh? Hugz, Kizzes, and never forget, fat bottom girlz make the world go round, lol!

Jonathan said...

I get up early during the week, since I have to be at work at 7:00 AM.

And yeah, I've got NO hate for chicks with a little "junk in the trunk"! I've done skinny chicks before, and when doin' it doggy style, those bony hips poke me most uncomfortably in my own hips. Nah, I prefer SOME meat on her bones (before she gets the meat of MY bone...did I just say that out loud??)!

Dirty Bitch Society said...

Jonathan, a man after my own heart. I wish there were more men just like you, at least next door, lol!

Dirty Bitch Society said...

Jonathan, I'd be borrowing sugar, from you,, all the time.

Dirty Bitch Society said...

Jonathan, pss, I've been known to use this analogy, when dealing with men;

If you'd buy a bike, would you buy a Sportster? No, you'd buy a Wide Glide, just for the ride.

Jonathan said...

Wide Glide! LOL! :-)

DirtyBitchSociety said...

Jonathan, ooooooh yea baby, more cushion for the pushin' right?
Sweet Dreams Darlin'!