Geo Sex Facts


GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN

Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa; half discovered, half wild,
naturally beautiful with fertile soil.

Between 23 and 30, a woman is like America; well developed and open to
trade, especially for someone with cash.

Between 31 and 35, a woman is like India; very hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty.

Between 36 and 40, a woman is like France; gently aging but still warm, and a desirable place to visit.

Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain; with a glorious and all conquering past.

Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Yugoslavia; lost the war and haunted by past mistakes.

Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Russia; very wide, and borders are now un-patrolled.

After 70, she becomes Tibet. Wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past and the wisdom of the ages.... only those with an adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge visit there.

GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN
Between 1 and 70, a man is like Iran - ruled by a dick

(But at 48, I feel like Jonestown)

10 comments:

Jonathan said...

My dick stops ruling me at 70??? Freakin' wonderful...I guess the golden years aren't so damned golden after all!

DirtyBitchSociety said...

Jonathan, that's not to say, you'll not be ordering Viagra online. Do you need a good link? If you're smart, you'll stock up now. Here's a tip though, you might not want to take it now. My son, my youngest, Waylon, told me he took it and had a raging hard-on for three+ hours. He said that it actually became painful because he'd partied and had to go to work w/this hard on. lol!
Yes, my boys tell me everything, unfortunately. They also call, whenever they're pooping. Almost always, I get a call and it goes something like this, "Hey Ma, how ya doin'? grrrunt,So, did I tell you about this grrrrunt new chick I met at that strip club grrrrrunt last week? grrrunt. Yea I went home with grrrrrrunt her and three other grrrunt girls she worked with grrrrrunt.They're room-grrrrrunt mates. I then asked what happened, did he get lucky or what? He says, "Nope, I didn't get any action grrrrunt but I saw some action. grrrrrunt. Yes, they danced naked in front of me but I was a grrrrrrrunt gentleman. He makes me so proud...

DirtyBitchSociety said...

jonathan, TMI, huh? That's what I said. Dirty bastards, I love every one of them!

Jonathan said...

I woulda waited until I was done layin' cable, but that's just me. Nice to know you guys have that kind of relationship, though. I can tell my mama anything, but I'd rather not. ;-)

My younger brother took the blue pill when he was 30 (as if 30 is old? Jerk!). He had one of those 3+ hour woodrows, too. He said it was fine when he was bonin' his woman, and since he climaxed before she did, he was still able to keep goin' and goin' until she had hit hers...a few times. Afterwards, though, he said getting to sleep was a real bitch.

I don't need the pill yet, thank goodness. But if I did, I'd certainly take it.

Dirty Bitch Society said...

jonathan, my boys and I are extremely close. Some people say we have no boundaries. We do but it's usually, they do not, under any circumstance want to hear about me and anything to do with sex, "Oh gross Mom." But they sure do tell me all their secrets. In turn, they also listened to me, when I taught them what to do to please a woman, as in, always make sure (and you make sure she's good by using toys ahead of time)she's got hers first. It's serves a dual purpose; she's happy and not thinking "Oh great, I gotta get all dirty again." And she'll be tighter because it's a muscle and once it's tense, you'll know it. See, it all works out and she won't think sex is one sided funky business. Nope, she'll wanna be that funky monkey.

Jonathan said...

what to do to please a woman, as in, always make sure (and you make sure she's good by using toys ahead of time)she's got hers first.

Agreed, 100%. I make sure she gets hers first, for three main reasons:

1. If she ain't happy, nobody's happy.

2. Hearing her scream like a banshee strokes pleases me and the ol' ego.

3. It makes her VERY receptive to what I want to do next.

Jonathan said...

Oops...I meant to say for #2 that hearing her scream both pleases me and strokes the ego.

Damn, I'm tired. Time to hit the hay.

Dirty Bitch Society said...

jonathan, such good news cause they're just ain't many men like you. See, it's only selfish if you wam bam thank ya ma'am and sooooooo many guys are like that. They wonder why their g-friends don't want to have sex and it's because they're not getting theirs. Guys, who realize that, it's not just playing fair, to get the woman there first but SMART. She's always tighter and receptive, the juices get flowing and omg I've got myself worked up...gotta go!

Vagina Dentata said...

Jonestown?
Purple coolaid?

DirtyBitchSociety said...

VD, oh yea, Kool-Aid with that special mix and Grain alcohol, that's about how I feel today. I do love purple.